About this girl…
In her first life, Suh Young Sook (name assigned her by an institution) became a Korean foundling.
In her second life, Suki (misinterpreted Korean nick-name) was adopted to America by a troubled and dysfunctional family, which she traded in to become a child bride and mother of two. Later as a single mom, welfare mom, jack of all trades, university graduate, then restless chameleon, she explored the ideas of beauty, meaning, and existence at every reinvention.
In her third life, Leanne (because Koreans prefer her name to sound foreign) has relocated to her native country to measure what she lost, what she gained, and to explore the profound impact adoption has had not only on her, but all other intercountry transracial adoptees and the Korean nation.
At this juncture, Girl #4708 is an investigator uncovering many truths that can only be revealed by the discomfort of culture shock. Always a feminist, she is becoming aware of the need for advocacy for unwed mothers and has learned a great deal about the cycle of adoption and how it is a symptom of larger social pathologies and a global mind-set of colonization between the privileged and the defeated. By living in Korea’s oppressive Confuscian society, she has come to believe the international adoption solution in Korea contributes to arresting development of social services which preserve existing family structures.
Girl #4708 is beginning to understand the society she was sent from, the realities of the adjummas who sent their children away for a better life, the awe inspiring economic development, the many centuries of culture behind it, and the realities of women and mothers here today. None of it is so black and white, and she wants to share that with the rest of the world, that adoption is radical surgery and its efficacy should be questioned and be resorted to only when there are absolutely no other options. She also wants to assist those who have already adopted in understanding how profound the dichotomy between loss and gain can be, and the schizm between the adoptee’s public family life and inner private feelings.
Girl #4708 is seeking the beginning of her story, and to know her real name and birth date. As she uncovers the stories and gets closer to the truth, she is disturbed and lonely, but happier than she’s ever been.
Bravo… great Blog, thanks for all that you say.
mybirthnameisallison
October 29, 2008 at 5:13 pm
Hi girl4708:
I love your blog and the power of your words. I’m a Korean adoptee currently involved in a Conflict Resolution graduate program. For an Intercultural Conflict Resolution class, I am in a group addressing intercultural issues in transracial adoption. As we dislike the typical method of interview/questionnaire and also know how much writing and discussing people have been doing about adoption for decades, we have turned this project into a letter project, and wanted to invite you to participate, if you so choose. We know many people have already written and created many complicated works and reflections around these issues, and also want to acknowledge that they can’t be distilled into one letter. If you would be interested in sharing something you have already written with us instead, we’d, of course, welcome that, too.
I’ve explained the project in further detail here: http://karachoi.wordpress.com/2009/05/08/intercultural-cr-letter-project/
Thanks so much for your time.
Kara
May 13, 2009 at 5:35 am
Girl #4708, I found this website while researching adoption and I was deeply moved. I would like to know if you have uncovered any new information about your birth parents and possible sibling. Please post an update. I wish you the best of luck in your research and journey to find out the truth in your history.
Gavi
October 18, 2009 at 11:05 pm
Thanks, Gavi
My parents have either passed away, haven’t heard my pleas, or choose to ignore them. I’ve come to accept that it may be too late for me, but I feel peaceful about that: I did everything a human could do to find them.
I had to hire a private detective who has possibly identified the whereabouts of girl #4709. However, I am having horrible writer’s block, since I have ONLY ONE CHANCE to make a first impression and explain what kind of person I am and that I mean her no harm.
I hope the right words will come to me and that she is receptive to them. Informing someone about another life may be just as hard as informing someone about a death. In the family.
So that’s where I’m at. Petrified. I like having hope that there is something more than just me. I’m kind of loathe to give that up should the letter be sent and I never get a reply.
girl4708
October 19, 2009 at 6:15 am
Girl #4708, I am so sorry that you found no success in contacting your birthparents. I understand your hesitation and fear about reaching out to the woman who may have been #4709. You are right in that hearing from you may open up many wounds for your possible sibling. Yet, you know deep inside that you have to try to contact her if you are going to complete your journey. You have come so far. Keep writing your drafts, take your time, and the words will come to you. I understand also the huge loss you will experience if you do not hear back from her. The thought of reaching a deadend in your search for this sibling and having to give up this dream must be terrifying. I wish you the best as you ponder this incredible decision.
Even if you do not reach the desired outcome, you have said that this search has given you peace and purpose and a happiness not known to you before. Your work is helping so many adoptees with a shared history of abuse and potential adoptive parents like myself who want to make the best decision for all involved.
Please keep posting updates. I will be waiting to hear if you have any positive contact with someone with a link to your true history.
Gavi
October 20, 2009 at 3:27 am
Thank for you for sharing so openly. I too am a Korean Adoptee who only recently has begun my search for identity. Thank you for your words. Please keep posting!
Kristin
November 4, 2009 at 7:31 pm